As the years went on and the weight and the scale went up I can honestly say I began to feel somewhat depressed and at times very alone. Being fat is a personal thing and different for everyone. In my case I wanted to hide. I was ashamed and embarrassed and not always good at loving people because I wasn't good at loving myself. I did know however, that there was one person who understood everything I was going through and felt every sad moment I felt and always gave me the courage and confidence to keep going. That person was God. And even when I felt like I'd done wrong in His eyes by not taking care of this gift (my body) like I know I should have, he was still there - regardless. Forgiving, never leaving me alone to fight this battle on my own. He loved me so much that He would do anything He needed in order to get me to where I wanted and needed to be. He was the one that I could turn to in the saddest moments and I'd be able to feel a love that is indescribable. Not that my parents, husband, children and close friends haven't been a huge part in supporting me too. I feel like God has put each one of them in my life for a particular reason to help me on this journey. He knew I couldn't do it alone and would need some tangible help along the way.
I've felt like in so many ways my relationship with God has been strengthened because I've turned to Him so much during this time. At times, I had no choice. I was miserable and cried out to Him for any help I could get. I wanted His approval. I wanted His council. Maybe me being fat was all part of the plan? I've not only learned how to love and serve others during all of this, but I've learned how to love and provide service for myself. (Something we as human beings don't do enough of.) I also believe you'll get as much out of something as you put in. In this case, I put a lot into God and I've received a lot from God, and our relationship has grown. In a good way. In turn, I've put a lot into losing weight and changing my life around the natural way and look at what I'm getting out of it. A new body and a new person.
Whatever your struggle may be, you may choose to go about it differently than I and I'm okay with that. For me, it was obviously making sure God was on board. For you, it may mean something totally different. Find what it is that's going to pull you through your darkest moments and toughest times and just remember, the amount of time you put into something will determine its outcome.
So beautiful ~ thank you!
ReplyDeletePaige,
ReplyDeleteThis is a beautiful post and one close to my heart as well! At times, I get a little nervous that others reading my blog will find me a bit over the top when it comes to the credit I give God in this journey. But I've determined that regardless of others' views or names they may call me (Jesus Freak, Bible Thumper just to name a couple) I will continue to give credit (and glory) where its due and it is all due to Him! And in the end, if I help 1000 people feel inspired to lose weight and only 1 to know and have that relationship with Jesus, then I will feel the greatest accomplishment is that 1 person who came to know Jesus.
Thank you for having the courage to put this out there. You are beautiful inside and out!
You are the woman God is with. Love you friend.
ReplyDeleteOh Paige. Such Truth. Thank you for sharing your heart and so much of your personal journey, I know the Lord is smiling because of you, because of your trust, your faithfulness and your testimony. What a blessin you are. I love you - B
ReplyDeleteJust found your blog and I'm now following. I can completely relate to this post! Thanks for sharing. Would love for you to come visit and follow back at
ReplyDeletehttp://mrstashalynn.blogspot.com
Blessings!
Tasha
I loved this post. A beautiful message and reminder that we are not in this alone. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteI just recently came across your blog. Congratulations on your weight loss journey and Thank you for writing such a beautiful and inspirational post.
ReplyDeleteJust found your blog! I LOVE this post!! You have written exactly what is in my heart! The main reason why I know that I am living a "lifestyle" and not a diet, the main reason why I know that I will succeed is my relationship with GOD!! He loves me so much and he would move mountains to rescue me when I call for him!! That makes all the difference in the world! Thank You for writing this post!
ReplyDeleteI tagged you in a post tonight!
ReplyDeletehttp://amy-healthyblogger.blogspot.com/2012/05/q.html
Today I noticed you've recently joined as a follower to my blog. I've been reading some of your posts this week and I love all of it.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree, and can relate, with the need for God's help in this journey. At the same time, once I told my mom God really helped me one week in my weight loss and she said, "Well, He must not be helping me." That's when I responded with, "Well, the Bible does say 'faith without works is dead' What a revelation that was for us both I think.
I look forward to reading more of your blog. I do find myself wondering how I came to be this person who enjoys exercise when i used to roll my eyes at people who ran or did anything intense. You've inspired me to write something along those lines on my blog. :)
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