I like to think of my body as being under construction. Even though I have come so far and am half the size I used to be, there are still areas that bother me. (Like the thick roll of skin around my belly. The good news is, it's now skin instead of fat!) I think for a lot of us, when we see our bodies and how much work needs to be done it can get discouraging. It can get overwhelming in fact. It wasn't until later on in my journey that I adopted the thinking that my body was a work in progress. That it was under construction to become a better and more efficient tool that would help me to live a longer, healthier life.
For many months I was in cruise control, often thinking of everything I needed to do to just stay afloat. I remember starting my journey and how unhappy I had become with the shell I was living in that I was desperate to change. After the weight started coming off little by little, I just kept at it. I kept going. I was in auto pilot mode. With having as much weight as I had to lose I didn't know how long it was going to take me to get to where I was going and I certainly couldn't see the big picture at the end but I just kept going. In fact, I didn't even know if getting to where I wanted to be was even possible. One day at a time. One step in front of the other. Some weeks I saw progress. Some weeks I didn't. Regardless, I just kept going. Anyone else ever felt like this?
I think for many years my body had been an enemy to me instead of a friend. We hadn't gotten along for years. It liked and was comfortable eating a certain way that I didn't necessarily approve of or think was right, but I couldn't seem to influence it to do differently. For so long I felt like my body had the upper hand and was in charge of me instead of me being in charge of it. After living life that way for so long it took time, sacrifice, and effort to change things around. To reverse rolls. That is why I'm not certain these "quick fix" fads are going to do people any good. In fact, it breaks my heart having already been through it before, that people think that trying a "quick fix" will do the trick. Don't get me wrong, I know some people who have had to make drastic changes and do it quickly to preserve life, so a doctor may recommend a certain path for a short time to get things under way but it's not meant to have that turn in to a lifestyle. Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to get at here is that for so long I let my body control me instead of me being the one telling it what we we're going to do. I was scared of my body. I certainly didn't believe in it. It did nothing but cause stress,disappointment, and a feeling of wanting to give up and just settle for the body I'd been given - fat and all!
It was the last six months of my journey that I wished I would have had from day one. Then again, I think I needed to go through everything I went through to make me as strong as I am today. It was within those last six months and then the past 2+ years of maintenance that I found the real person that has lived in my body for over 40 years. She is strong. She is determined. She is motivated. And she is willing to undergo as many years of construction as she needs to in order to remain healthy and happy.